Valentine ’s Day is finally here . And in keeping with tradition , the lonely inwardness amongst us will spend the evening share in a hallowed ritual known as “ humanCathycomic . ” But it does n’t have to be this way ! There ’s an total universe of products out there designed for the express use of helping you lie to yourself about how so very alone you really are .
We ’ve compiled some of the good ( to use the term loosely ) below . And call up , no matter what they say , sometimes , the objects really can love you back .
Thisfluffy , disembodied torsois design to “ recreate the contours of your loved one , ” assume your sleep together one is a headless amputee whose only stay limb is fused to a rubber-base paint kitchen baseball glove .
If rubbing up against a finger trunk is a little too close to the real thing for your like , this machinelike plantwill you keep you company at a safe , personal space house of cards - friendly space . The best part ? It nod in concord to everything you say , because at least the plant know how to be supportive , you say from your mother ’s basement .
They know what they did .
Plus hey , if you salute a piddling beforehand , I bet she start to voice likeshe really imply it .
Starting to forget what it feels like to go through a lover ’s soft caress ? Do n’t worry , plastic in the shape of a handis sort of the same matter peradventure . And it even comes in a child - sized hand edition , because the only mortal who can put limits on how deeply , sorely uncomfortable the masses around you are is you .
Just becausethere ’s no one else to love you does n’t mean you ca n’t ( make ) love ( to ) yourself . Or that you ca n’t cry afterwards . The Howl Tissue Pillow say you may !
Tired of coming home to an empty star sign or flat ? It does n’t have to be that way . These shadowy friendswill always be waiting for you , 24 hours a day , 7 days a week for the rest of your life . Just so long as you stay outdoors .
You might think your Valentine ’s meal of a undivided bowl of Ramen is just about as lamentable as can be , but you ’re wrong . Things can get way sadder!Which is why there ’s this smartphone loading dock / food bowling ball . The only legitimate next step ? Felt pinhead handles .
Just because you ’re alone does n’t mean the night can’tend with a goodnight kiss(or several * wink * ) . Also dandy for CPR practice . Safety first .
Hey , itworked for this guy :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aagW8uoFfkM
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