You may have seen report card this hebdomad that a squad at MIT is build up so - called “ 4D printing ” applied science , which would go far beyond current 3D printing engineering science ’s content to print three - dimensional aim with a machine . This team has stated that its quaternary “ D ” postulate objects self - assembling . I want to insure you , my unwavering investors , that 11D Technologies has long been aware of this development and continues to achieve superior technological progress that will take into account our company to remain a leader in this field for the foreseeable future .
As you know , our prototype 5D Printer contains a patent - pending fifth “ D , ” which permits the 5D to essay out all 4D Printers within a 10 - mile radius , commandeer them , and re - programme them to destroy any nearby 3D printers and then ego - terminate . The 5D is currently await regulatory approval from the Consumer Product Safety Commission , the National Transportation Safety Board , and the Department of Homeland Security .
At the same sentence , I ’m pleased to describe that our advances continue apace . We are in the initial testing stage of our radical - forward-looking 6D printing machine . Once useable , the 6D will create a small but precise tear in spacetime , tolerate it to preemptively block all future development of 7- , 8- , 9- , or 10D printer . This exciting exploitation will allow us to remain ahead of the curve for years to come .
Of course , it ’s important for you to know that we are not resting there . While it is still in the other conceptual design phases , I can report to you that we are beginning to see the first possible successes with the work toward our revolutionary 11D. We will inform you as soon as the 11D is quick for examination , although , to be technically accurate , when it is ready you will immediately know about it , and in fact you will always have have a go at it about it and always have been one with it . It is a truly all - encompassing progression .
at last , I ’m pleased to cover that as of next after part all of our printer models will be usable in “ True Black . ”
Image : Mcor technology
Michael Wardis a regular contributor to McSweeney ’s and survive with his married woman and printers in Watertown , Massachusetts .
This billet was republished with permission from McSweeney ’s .
3D printing
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